I think of my earliest realizations that racism still existed was actually a conversation I had with my mom. I can't remember exactly how the conversation went, but it was basically me telling her how I had more of an attraction to darker men and then her making the comment that "I tried telling your Dad to be prepared that you might bring one home." To that I asked why she would say a thing like that and she said your dad is a bit racist, which was a complete surprise to me. I had a cousin (whom I consider an Uncle due to age) that made it quite clear he was racist, but not my dad. I can't quite remember my age, but I believe I was a senior in high school or the end of my freshman year of college. Up to that point I had never even dated anybody white. I had dated Mexican (because the was the majority of the community population in high school) , my high school sweetheart was half indie, half white (but he didn't look white), and I hadn't ever been in a relationship with someone black, but I had hung around with a few different black guys.
I was so surprised by that conversation with my mom because my dad is one of the most caring people I know. He is the guy who has swallowed thousands and thousands of dollars helping out his other six siblings and his parents, the man who was the first one to come upon a car accident and immediately start pulling people out of the wreck, the man who wanted me to take a sip of his drink as a kid just so he could laugh at the face he knew I would make, the man who jokes around with my first dates, and the man who would do and has done absolutely everything to give his wife and girls a good life. Him racist? Was news to me.
Then my mom had made the comment of "think about your kids." I laughed at this," Think of my kids? Mom we are living in the 21st century." I think that was the moment I realized how short a century is, that was when I became skeptical to think how many white people who still are.
I am not racist, but I am still fearful. Is it from the stereotypes made? Not the ones we all joke about like all black people like fried chicken or all white girls crave Starbucks. But the ones like all black people steal or all Muslims believe in the resolution of violence.
So is stereotyping racist? I don't think I am superior because I am white, or personally attack anyone with racial slurs under my breathe while passed by someone of a different race. I don't think 'damn those niggers and those self-exploding bastards,' but I am skeptical when I sit in a room with a Muslim in traditional dress or pass a black citizen in the street alone in the evening. Does my skepticism make me racist? Has stereotyping lead me unconsciously through antipathy to being racist?
And actually these thoughts of skepticism don't cross my mind if I see a female Muslim in a head dress or pass a black woman late at night, it is only with men. So then am I sexist?
Stereotyping is defined as a generalization, where as racism is defined as a general belief of superiority due to race. Positive stereotypes I think can be humorous, a way to laugh at ourselves and even a starting point. I saw this humor when I searched the hashtag I'm racist.
Sometimes we expect ourselves and others to live up to our stereotypes (below).
And others admit their biases.
Negatives stereos types is what is dangerous. I think they imply superiority and can lead to aversion and antipathy which is racism.
I think we can live with stereotypes, we just need to remember the negatives come from a marginalized percentage.
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